Low Self Esteem Counselling Chesterfield and Mansfield

Although it isn’t often recognised as a mental health condition in itself, low self-esteem feeds into a wide range of conditions such as depression, social anxiety and early life developmental trauma. Self-esteem is a bit like a shield which protects you from the everyday stresses of life. If you lose a job, go through a tough break-up, perform poorly at an important event or go through any sort of rough patch, self-esteem helps you dust yourself off, count it as a minor setback and get going again. Low self-esteem leaves you exposed, and any criticism, stress or perceived failure strikes to your core and can lead to more serious problems. Anybody struggling might benefit from our low self-esteem counselling in Chesterfield and Mansfield or can try self-help techniques.

The Cycle of Low Self Esteem

Low self-esteem can be so damaging because it is a self-perpetuating cycle. Imagine somebody has to give a speech at a family member’s wedding. An individual with low self-esteem will assume the worst because of their intrinsic beliefs that they aren’t interesting and nobody will care what they have to say. As he or she stands up to speak, these niggling doubts and negative thoughts take hold, and as a result the speech is delivered uncomfortably and uneasily. It doesn’t go well, which entrenches the negative thought patterns more deeply and means that the next time the individual is asked to speak in public, he or she will say no. As the negative stimulus is avoided, the underlying thoughts are allowed to run rampant. It’s these thought patterns and avoiding behaviours that ourlow selt-esteem counsellor in Glapwell, Chesterfield and Mansfield will identify and challenge to improve their self-esteem.

What Causes Low Self Esteem?

There are many different potential causes to low self-esteem, and it’s hard to pin the issue down to any specific event or trauma. However, as is often the case with psychological conditions, experiences in childhood are usually extremely significant. As a child, you haven’t built up much protective self-esteem, so any negative experiences have a much greater effect. If your physical and emotional needs aren’t met in childhood or you are emotionally or physically abused, this can lead you to think that you aren’t worthy of love and are unimportant. Experiences as an adult can also cause low self-esteem, such as being unemployed, the death of a loved one or a period of debilitating illness. Our counsellor will help you identify the root causes of the issues and address them in a healthier way.

A quote that we particularly like at Therapist Ltd in Chesterfield and Mansfield is by ‘Robert Fulghum’ as it epitomises the union of what Carl Jung would call the ‘Wonder Child’ of then and the integrated child of now that hopes and dreams. It reads: 

” I know what I really want for Christmas. I want my childhood back.  Nobody is going to give me that….. I know it doesn’t make sense, but since when is Christmas about sense, anyway? It’s about a child of long ago and far away. and it is about the child of now. In you and me. Waiting behind the door of our hearts for something wonderful to happen. The union of the child of then and now is often a magical, cathartic process in inner child work. Inner child work is often useful at addressing the root cause of low self esteem.

What Can I Do About Low Self Esteem?

Self-help is readily available to address self-esteem issues. Many people experience the problem in a mild to moderate form, and taking simple steps like identifying the underlying beliefs which contribute to your low self-esteem and tackling them one by one can help immensely. By finding contrary examples to your underlying beliefs (which are often formed by our inner childhood experiences) you show that your opinion of yourself isn’t actually accurate. Then by setting yourself new challenges, focusing on the things you like about yourself and being more assertive you can break out of the cycle of low self-esteem. However, these measures aren’t always effective, and in these cases psychotherapy or low self-esteem counselling in Chesterfield and Mansfield can be extremely beneficial.

If you or your loved one is struggling with low self-esteem, our counsellors are here to help renuinte you with your lost pass or support you over the hurdle of now. Most people will have their self-esteem rocked at some points during life, but anybody who can’t break out of the negative cycle might be well advised to consider talking to a therapist. You’ll work through your issues together, in a supportive, open environment, and learn to believe in yourself again. If you’re interested in counselling for low self-esteem, we’ll have a chat with you to discuss your options. Getting help from a counsellor can give you that boost you need to take control of your life and start moving towards your goals. Stop by our Glapwell counselling offices on Mansfield Road between Chesterfield and Mansfield or get in touch over the phone today and see how we can help you!

For more information about our costs for low self esteem counselling services please see the about us page.